Attachment is something that has been wired within us before we even learn language, before we even have any personal preferences, before we even have the proper sense of who we are. And when we understand this, it can change our views on how we see our relationship patterns in our lives, why we stay in relationships that we shouldn't, why we leave, and why leaving certain people may seem less like a decision and more like ripping something off your chest. Picture this: A tiny infant rests in a plastic-sided bed, just born. One moment without care might be too much. Its limbs are weak, its voice is small, and it needs constant warmth. Without help arriving fast enough, survival slips away quickly. Speech comes later, and walking even after that. Alone, it cannot manage anything at all. Think about it. Could this tiny child be picking whether to…